Way out West (incorporating Way up North)

I knew it

I was travelling on the tube on sunday and saw a picture of a red-eyed and comatose squirrel on the back page of another passengers' newspaper, unfortunately for me and several other passengers a small far-eastern boy began projectile vomiting before I could investigate further.

Subsequent researches brought me to this story:

http://icsouthlondon.icnetwork.co.uk/0100news/0200southlondonheadlines/tm_objectid=16217629&method=full&siteid=50100&headline=squirrels-on-crack-name_page.html

This begins to explain their desperate searching of my pots, although this part of West London is rather short of crack houses. What other highly addictive substance might our well-heeled neighbours be hiding in their gardens; Waitrose Organic Pork Pies perhaps? Some little time ago Tesco reported an 85% disparity between the number of pork pies actually sold and the number that their shoppers admitted to buying, as addictions go, you are likely only to hurt yourself.

Finally, and with grateful thanks to my highlands and islands correspondent, a new descriptive term to thrill you all, this refers to the type of anodyne 'hits from the shows' recordings made by boys' choirs as 'granny catnip'.

posted by Lampy @ 10/12/2005 06:25:00 pm